Hotel English

In a Tokyo Hotel: `Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such a thing is please not to read notis.'

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: `The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.'

In a Leipzig elevator: `Do not enter lift backwards, and only when lit up.'

In a Belgrade hotel elevator: `To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.'

In a Paris hotel elevator: `Please leave your values at the front desk.'

In a hotel in Athens: `Visitors are expected to complain at the office between 9 and 11 A.M. daily.'

In a Yugoslavian hotel: `The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.'

In a Japanese hotel: `You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.'

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from Russian Orthodox monastery: `You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.'

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: `Not to perambulate the corriders during the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.'